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“Two Amidst Darkness”
By Frau Eva
Concept by DoveCG
“Well?” he asked, smirking mischievously. The man across from him gave him a look of disdain.
“Got any fives?” the man asked in a husky voice, momentarily taking his hand away from his cards to brush away a strand of his obsidian hair.
“We’re not playing Go Fish, you know,” he responded to his companion with a complacent smile as he fanned himself with his cards.
“Dammit!” the man said, angrily throwing his cards down onto the table, “All these damn rules you keep telling me are for Go Fish! Now if we’re not playing that, then what the hell are we playing?”
“My own special game,” he replied, still flashing a satisfied smile as she curled a long lock of azure hair around his thin fingers.
“Your OWN special game?” the man growled angrily, a single black brow twitching convulsively. “Why the hell did I EVER agree to you joining with me? All you are is a nuisance,” he said, crossing his arms as he sulked in his chair.
“Oh, come on now,” Volphied replied, placing his hand over DarkStar’s own, “You’re just cranky because you’re losing. Besides,” he said, gesturing wildly with his makeshift fan of cards, “That war was just SO boring!”
“Anything’s better than this,” Darkstar said, looking away from his companion.
“Oh, please!” Volphied whined, crossing his legs, “You always were such a sore loser! That’s why I suggested joining with YOU, after all. L-sama forbid, you would have NEVER admitted to losing that battle! Now that’s why everyone’s misunderstanding us now; of COURSE the God of Destruction would try to wreck the world apart! Now, if you would have simply let me win, people would understand us better, but nooooooo. You just had to win, didn’t you? Oh, and I was just so CUTE in my dragon form! But now I have to be in this ugly black bug you call a body and-,” Volphied said, but was soon stopped by Darkstar slamming his fists on the table.
“Will you quit with that! It’s not like we can do anything about it now so just forget it!” Darkstar yelled. He then slumped back into his chair, looking away from his companion.
Volphied placed his hand over his mouth, eyes wide with alarm. “Well, if you’re going to be like that...” he said, closing his eyes and sitting back into his chair. He then put on a sulking expression as well, arms and legs crossed. Silence overtook the scene as the two Gods brooded.
“Hey,” Darkstar said to break the quiet, his voice slightly apologetic, “Are we gonna finish that game?”
Volphied smiled cheerily, again taking up his cards. “Of course, Duggy!” he said with a wave of his hand.
“Would you stop calling me that?!” Darkstar replied, irritability returning to his voice, “I am Darkstar, the Dark Lord Dugradigdo, God of Destruction! You simply can’t go around giving something like that your stupid little pet names!”
“You’ll always be my Duggy,” Volphied simply replied with a smile, “And besides, Dugradigdo is just SUCH a horrid name. I think Mom really liked up Dragon Gods the best; we get all the cute names...”
“You are SO irritating,” Darkstar mumbled, taking up his scattered cards.
“You know, that wasn’t such a smart strategy,” Volphied said, “to show your cards off like that.” Darkstar’s eyes widened as he realized his burst of rage had ensured his failure. “You should really learn to control your anger, Duggy.”
“Oh, come on!” Darkstar said, “You’re at least going to let me draw again, right?”
“I’m afraid not,” the Dragon God replied with a shake of his head, “The rules don’t allow for redraws for little fits of anger.”
“Just what the hell are these damn rules anyway?” Darkstar said angrily.
“I told you,” Volphied said with a smile, “It’s my own special game!”
“Right, right,” he replied, his hand on his forehead and his elbow resting on the table.
“Now,” Volphied said, a serious look on his handsome countenance, “Do you have any threes?”
“What?!” Darkstar screamed, “I thought you said we weren’t playing Go Fish!”
“We’re not,” Volphied defended, “But this is my own special game, and if I want to ask for threes, I can ask for threes.”
Darkstar shuddered with rage, his eyes wide with absolute fury. “WHAT IN L-SAMA’S NAME IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?!?!”
“Now that’s nothing to yell about,” Volphied said calmly, “Besides, if you knew the rules you’d just break them like you always do.”
Darkstar mumbled something under his breath as he laid back into his chair, pretending to focus all of his attention on his cards. Volphied simply smiled contentedly and did the same. “Um...” the Dark Lord muttered, his nose in his cards, “Got any twos?”
“You can’t ask that,” Volphied said calmly, not even bothering to look up from his cards.
“What do you mean,” Darkstar said, barely able to contain his rage, “I can’t ask that?”
“Only I can ask that,” Volphied said calmly, still not looking the Dark Lord eye to eye.
“Why?” Darkstar asked through clenched teeth, his eyebrow twitching rapidly.
“Because I make the rules, silly!” Volphied said, giving Darkstar a cheerful smile.
The Dark Lord finally exploded with rage, his hands quickly overturning the table. Cards scattered everywhere, the Dragon God now knocked to the ground.
Volphied looked up at the Dark Lord in shock, a single hand to his cheek. “You...” Volphied muttered, taking his hand away to reveal a small cut on his countenance, “You hurt my face...”
“Yeah, and it’s something I should have done a long time ago, you vain, prissy, effeminate, irritating, goody-goody Dragon God!”
Volphied’s entire demeanor immediately changed from shock to anger, the exasperated Dragon God rising to face his companion face to face. “Oh yeah? Well, you’re nothing but a dense, cranky, uncultured neanderthal of a Dark Lord!”
“Why you stupid-,” Darkstar said, but was quickly interrupted by a distant voice.
“Hey! Hey! You up there!” Valgaav screamed, “How about a little divine power here?!”
“Oh, look, Duggy!” Volphied said, turning to look downward on the ancient dragon-Mazoku halfbreed, “I think he’s trying to tell us something!” Volphied then knelt closer, staring down at Valgaav through the swirling void of black power, “Come on, Mr. Foofy! What is it, boy?”
“Dammit, you stupid Dragon God!” Valgaav screamed angrily, “My name is not Mr. Foofy! For the last time, I am Valgaav, last of the ancient dragons, the most powerful race of all dragons, and the favored Mazoku servant of the deceased Dark Lord MaryOu Gaav! YOU SIMPLY CAN’T GO AROUND GIVING THINGS LIKE THAT YOUR STUPID LITTLE PET NAMES!”
“See, I win. Two to one says you’re annoying,” Darkstar muttered, crossing his arms.
“Hmph! Well, what do you know? Why should I even listen to something with such bad hair anyway?” Volphied said defensively, petulantly placing his hands on his hips.
“Guys,” Lina said, watching the enraged Valgaav seemingly screaming to himself, “I think he’s finally completely gone off the deep end.”
“I told you the ancient dragon was unstable,” the Supreme Elder said, barely able to speak as he lay bleeding on the ground.
“Shut up!” Valgaav screamed, pointing threateningly to the Supreme Elder, “I’m gonna fry you extra crispy in about two seconds, Grandpa!” Valgaav then again turned to the sky, screaming, “Hey, you! Pay attention to me! I’m the one doing all your dirty work down here! HEY! What did I just say?! Stop that! No! Stop! Stop that right now! What are you doing?! Oh Gods, no! Stop kissing!!!”
“And to think that I almost thought we weren’t going to survive this one,” Zelgadis said to himself, “He might be formidable physically, but mentally...”
“No, I’m sure there’s a good explanation for this,” Filia said, “....Right?”
“No! Stop it right now!” Valgaav continued to shout, “For the love of the Gods, that’s just disgusting! Have you no shame?! Oh L-sama, would you just stop it and listen to me?!?!” He finally simply collapsed to the ground, wailing in frustration.
“Something’s not right...” Filia said to herself, cautiously walking forward.
“Filia, are you insane?” the Supreme Elder shrieked as loud as his abused lungs could allow, “Come back here and get him a straightjacket!”
The priestess quickly resisted the urge to shout something quite nasty and simply continued walking forward. Soon she was merely a few feet in front of him, the ancient dragon bawling on the ground. She tentatively reached out, drawing his head into her lap. He put up no resistance and simply continued his wailing. “There, there,” she said soothingly, “It’ll be alright.”
The Slayers stood there in shock as they watched Valgaav, last of the powerful ancient dragon race, preferential servant of the Dark Lord MaryuOu Gaav, and controller of Darkstar, the ultimate Dark Lord from another world, wail in Filia’s lap like a baby. “Now what could have gotten you so upset?” Filia said, looking upward. She then blushed, her face taking on a disgusted grimace. “Ew...” she muttered, feeling her insides twist up with nausea. “I think I see why,” she said to herself as she again turned her attention to the ancient dragon weeping miserably in her lap.
“Come on,” she said softly, gently lifting the ancient dragon’s head onto her shoulder, “Let’s talk about all this over a nice cup of tea.” Filia and Valgaav then rose together from the ground, the ancient dragon sniffling like a child. They walked off together, the group still too shocked to do anything but watch.
“Umm....so what do we do now?” Amelia asked, looking up at the immobile Darkstar.
“I guess we just do whatever it was we were doing before,” Lina said, taking up the Bow of Light and aiming it at Dugradigdo. She fired, the arrow immediately shooting forward and hitting the immense God of Destruction. Somewhere within the inky blackness they could hear something whine, “You bitch! I broke a nail!”
With that, the fighting ensued once more.
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